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marriage

Marriage

Conflict Resolution Strategies for Married Couples

July 15, 2020
conflict resolution strategies for married couples

Today, Tyler and I are sharing with you some conflict resolution strategies for when you and your spouse get into an argument. This article was borne out of a lot of experience with conflict with each other. When we first got married at the ripe age of 20, we fought…A LOT. We had to learn “on the job” how to fight fairly with each other. 

This is us! We’ve been married for 11 years. It just keeps getting better! 🙂

Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.

Proverbs 19:11

A few memorable instances of us fighting fairly – NOT!

After several minutes of sobbing hysterically at Tyler, he replied: “Your tears are invalid.” 

Once, while expressing my frustration and anger at something that Tyler deemed benign, he laughed at me. So I threw my keys at him. And he laughed some more. 

If you’ve ever thought your husband had a heart of stone you can take comfort knowing I (Tyler) had the emotional sensitivity of a gargoyle. I thought I was the great arbiter of which emotions were justifiable and which were not. Turns out you’re better off empathizing and actually caring about what your spouse cares about. 

On my part (Tiffany), I had to realize that I was allowing my emotions to rule me – for me, what I felt was my truth. My feelings were reality, and whatever Tyler did or said could not convince me otherwise. I unintentionally weaponized my tears against him in arguments, and they quickly became ineffective in convincing him of anything.

The strength of your emotional response to a situation has no correlation to how true it is or isn’t. Sometimes I (Tyler) felt like held hostage by Tiffany’s emotions in any given situation. She would feel something so strongly it made it difficult to disagree without further hurting her feelings. She has since greatly grown in her emotional self-control, which has stopped more disagreements from unnecessarily escalating and makes it easier for me to be sensitive when she does feel something strongly.  

Both of us have said things to each other we regret, taken small hurts too personally, thrown old failures at each other like daggers, and generally just been immature, selfish and filled with pride. 

Since our first year of marriage, we have grown a lot (and, clearly, there was a lot of room to grow!) through the power of God. We wanted to share some conflict resolution strategies with you here today to hopefully help you through difficult situations with your spouse. 

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Activities & Crafts Marriage

26 Summer Date Ideas

June 30, 2020
Summer date ideas

It’s summer time! And what a strange summer it’s been so far…

Look, we ALL need some fun, de-stressing dates with our spouse this summer. Talk to your spouse and pick a day of the week to be your “date day” and then make it happen! Even if you don’t have a sitter, some of these can all be done from the comfort of your home. The rest are social-distancing approved.

Also, if you want more stay-at-home date ideas, I’ve got a whole year’s worth of ideas right here.

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Devotionals for Moms Marriage

Combating Critical Thoughts About Your Husband

June 22, 2020
combating critical thoughts

It’s Monday morning, and perhaps the magic of Father’s Day is beginning to wane. Yesterday, we honored and praised the dads in our lives. We could name a laundry list of wonderful attributes about them. But today, all of those critical thoughts we held back yesterday are sneaking their way to the forefront of our minds, turning us slightly sour. 

Why does he have to do it like that? 

How many times do I have to remind him?

Is he ever going to be better at this?

When will he ever stop doing that? 

I don’t do that, why does he? 

These critical examinations of our husband’s shortcomings run like an ongoing commentary in the background as we go through our days. 

Perfection. It’s what I so often expect from my husband. 

(I mean, to be fair, I often expect perfection out of myself, too.) 

But, as I poke and prod at my husband – whether silently or aloud – I’m forgetting one important thing: in the same way that God is working on me, molding me to become more and more like His Son, He’s doing the same work on my husband. 

And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.

2 Corinthians 3:18

By continually pointing out the ways that my husband is not perfect – perhaps in an attempt to make him grow or maybe because I’m just annoyed – I’m not entrusting my husband to the One who is actually helping him to grow. 

I don’t need to be my husband’s growth police. 

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Marriage

52 Stay-In Date Night Ideas

February 26, 2020
stay-in date night ideas

So you want to prioritize your marriage, but with little ones in the house it’s hard – if not impossible – to get out for regular date nights. The good news is that with a little bit of preparation, you can have really great quality time with your spouse at home. I’ve put together a list of 52 stay-in date night ideas for you and your spouse to do after the kids go down for bed!

52 ideas: that’s one for each week of the year…so you’ve got ONE FULL YEAR of stay-in date night ideas right here!

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Marriage

Scriptures to Pray Over for Your Husband

February 24, 2020
praying scriptures for your husband
For the busy mom: listen to an audio recording of this post!

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    So you want to prioritize your husband and pray for him more – but what should you pray exactly? Here are some scriptures to pray over for your husband as well as a printable prayer prompt at the end with daily verses to pray. You can also check out this post by My Joy in Chaos with 50+ more scriptures to pray for your husband!

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